Pause

Listen to the silence that the storm within you demands.

I have been thinking about living in the present. Partly because my therapist keeps reminding me to and partly because I have been telling myself that I do not want to acknowledge my life in hindsight. I don’t want the rear mirror to hold moments that I rushed through in search for better, shinier, next…
The acknowledgment that this, the right now, is my life.

I struggle with it. The idea that the now is where I should exist. I have lived for so long feeling like I am in transit; in an airport lobby, packed suitcases and feet ready to run.

I am thinking about this as I take shallow breaths and looking up from reading data on climate change and global warming for work. The silence in my house is reminding me I should pause, replay Float by Janelle Monae and have a very very late lunch.

Maybe that is what I need. A pause. A parenthesis of sorts. Something that suspends the now so that I can touch it, feel it, remind myself of the importance of the now.

Something that reminds me to stop and listen to the silence that the storm within me demands.

Shiru_wa_Wanjiku2023

Note: I have been thinking of moving my writing into a different direction and this is an experiment I am trying out. I hope you enjoy it.